09 September 2005

Horizontal Optical Movement

I had spent the afternoon yesterday reading, as I blogged previously. I am afraid I will repeat that today. I only have classes in the morning, that 3-hour seminar on discourse relations. So far that was done, and right now I am taking a break in the graduate library entering another entry while waiting for my documents to print.

Reading can be boring sometimes, which make me want to take a break and blog for a while. Can't you believe that yesterday, my first highlighter for the semester ran out already? I used it for just two weeks! It just shows how many articles I need to read.

Actually, as the title implies, sometimes it just passes my eyes without going into my brain. Or rather, it does, but I don't fully digest it. But then I highlight the main points, and that makes it easier to go back whenever I need to. So I do a routine that consists of horizontal optical movement, then some time later, color-guided skimming.

There was a fire drill earlier today. Around 9:40 am, Baldy Hall, where I am most of the time, and where my seminar class is located, was shaken when the fire alarm went. And so we marched outside, all the while continuing the discussion on whether the intentions of the reader, the intentions of the writer, or the intentions of the analyst matter in discourse relations. But then after five minutes, the drill was over and we were allowed to go back in.

I had a couple of homework that was quite easy. One consisted of finding out the sound changes that happened in certain Indo-European languages, and the other was about trying to analyze the morphology of some indegenous South American languages. There is another homework that I need to do, and that is analyzing the different concepts of "bank" in 1) a Saussurean way, and 2) in a Wittgensteinean way.

I am missing the calls of my parents. They are on vacation now; they are spending a week in Paris. Remember that they live in Vienna. The other day when I learned from my sister that they went to Paris, I had this strange feeling that I didn't quite had the words for it. Now I do. I feel like slowly drifting away from them, but not in a negative way. I am slowly establishing my own pattern of living.

To elaborate: Once when I was younger, I never imagined to be in a situation when my parents would go somewhere for a long time without me knowing. They would always tell me. I guess I just took that for granted. I felt like I had a right to know. Now obviously I don't anymore. Although we are members of one family, we don't live together anymore, and they aren't obligated anymore to tell us of their wherabouts. And conversely, I don't have a right to know either.

In the past, all members of the family share the same experiences in travel, at least. Whenever the father goes, everyone goes. Now, it's different. My parents have been to different places in Europe without us. I have been to Taiwan to present a paper, and now I am here for my career, a place where they haven't been to yet. And sooner or later, my sister will do the same thing.

I hate to see this as a collapse. A breakup. Somehow it is similar to what happens to boybands and girlbands, when each member decides to pursue their own interests. Is it parallel to that? I think it is inevitable. Honestly, I cannot explain what I feel about it. I am not sad, but I am not happy either. Anyone can try to shed light on this?

2 comments:

  1. You could try to stay in a closer contact with your parents cause it sounds a bit sad what you tell!
    ...perhaps regular calling them...writing emails or letters...visiting them more often...

    I think it's really important doing all these things so that's kind of regular!

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  2. this is 2 years late but i just recently discovered your blog. Anyway, I call that growing up.

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