29 February 2008

Mastermind

So, today is the day that the prospective graduate students arrive on campus. I already picked up most of them, the earliest was at 11:00 AM, and now, I am just passing the time to do the final ones, at 9:00 and 10:10 PM, respectively.

Reflecting back on this, I find that my plan worked. Even though there was a slight trouble, I was able to fix it. One of the prospective students claimed the wrong bag, and so we had to arrange something in order for the right bag to be with the right person. And the slight trouble has been fixed.

I should be happy. This is the thing that gets me off. If my plan works, and everything works fine, I should be happy. But somehow, I am not. Somehow I feel a slight thorn in the throat.

I do not want to disclose the real reason for this, but I think I do know why. It is because some people resent what is happening at the moment, due to circumstances that are hard to explain.

Come to think of it, it is not that hard. Humankind is inherently evil.

If you see potential competition coming in, would you welcome them with open arms? I don't think so. So I guess I see where the people are coming from, but don't blame it on me. I am just a pawn in a large chess game. I may be the mastermind for this small endeavor of the week, but I do not operate the whole system.

Humanness is indeed a complicated matter. Watching how people behave in a competitive atmosphere is interesting, yet scalding at the same time. It turns people bitter, it brings out the bad side of people.



(The facade, from my Grand Central Terminal Series)

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