11 February 2009

Have You Been to this Lab Before?

"Hi! Have you been to this lab before?"

"No."

"Ok, kindly just give me a second. Hmmmm, it says here on our records that you have just been here last week, and you have already been the participant of the current experiment that is currently running. I am sorry to tell you that you cannot be a participant in the experiment for the second time."

"Oh, but I didn't know that it is the same experiment."

"But if you would kindly look at the sign-up page, it tells you there what the eligibility requirements are."

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"Hi! Have you been to this lab before?"

"No."

"Ok then. Before we start, I need to ask you a few questions. What was the language that you have been speaking from birth up to the age of five?"

"Spanish."

"Oh, I am sorry to tell you but you are not eligible for this experiment. In this experiment, we are only looking for native speakers of Mandarin Chinese, Korean, or Japanese. Unfortunately, we cannot run you as a participant."

"Ok."

(one week later)

"Hi! Have you been to this lab before?"

"No."

"Ok then. Before we start, I have a few questions to ask you. What was the language that you have been speaking from birth up to the age of five?"

"Spanish."

-----

"Hi! Have you been to this lab before?"

"I don't think so."

"Ok. Before we start, I need to ask a few personal questions if you don't mind, ok?"

"Sure."

"What is the language that you have been speaking from birth to the age of five?"

"English."

"Due to the fact that our experiments are federally funded, we have to ask you the following questions. If you feel uncomfortable answering them, you may choose not to. First question, what do you think your gender is?"

"Hmmm, (hesitates) female?"



(Statue of Tomas Masaryk, from my Embassy Row Series)

2 comments:

  1. It seems fun to interview people ... ;-)

    ReplyDelete
  2. Sidney,

    Fun, yes, but sometimes, it is annoying too since there seem to be lots of dumb moments.

    ReplyDelete