A friend of mine recently got married to his college sweetheart. Coincidentally, someone e-mailed me this funny message. Read on and share a laugh...
Dear Tech Support:
Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0, I soon noticed that the new program began unexpected child processing that took up a lot of space and valuable resources. In addition, Wife 1.0 installed itself into all other programs and now monitors all other system activity, such as Poker Night 10.3, Football 5.0, Hunting & Fishing 7.5, and Racing 3.6. I can't seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while attempting to run my favorite applications. I'm thinking about going back to Girlfriend 7.0, but the uninstall doesn't work on Wife 1.0.
Thanks, A Troubled User.
RE: Subject: Upgrade from GF 7.0 to WF 1.0 version
Dear Troubled User:
This is a very common problem that men complain about. Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 thinking that it is just an Utilities & Entertainment program. Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and is designed by its Creator to run EVERYTHING! It is also impossible to delete Wife 1.0 or to return to Girlfriend 7.0. It is also impossible to uninstall, or purge the program files from the system once Installed! You cannot go back to Girlfriend 7.0 because Wife 1.0 is designed to terminate that. Look in your Wife 1.0 User Manual under Warnings-Alimony-Child Support. I recommend that you keep Wife1.0 and work on improving the situation. I suggest you installing the background application "Yes Dear" to alleviate software augmentation. The best course of action is to enter the command C:\APOLOGIZE because ultimately you will have to give the APOLOGY command before the system will return to normal anyway. Wife1.0 is a great program, but it tends to be very high maintenance. Wife 1.0 comes with several support programs, such as Clean 3.0, Cook It 1.5 and Do Bills 4.2. However, be very careful how you use these programs. Improper use will cause the system to launch the program Nag Nag 9.5. Once this happens, the only way to improve the performance of Wife 1.0 is to purchase additional software. I recommend Flowers 2.1 and Diamonds 5.0 ! WARNING!!! DO NOT, under any circumstances, install Secretary With Short Skirt 3.3. This application is not supported by Wife 1.0 and will cause irreversible damage to the operating system.
Best of luck,